In fact, it is great are feelings to help others, have friends, be their support in difficult life situations, spoil children and listen to other opinions. A person needs a person. After all, feelings are born during mutual assistance. devotion, love, respect and solidarity.
The thing is, it’s really scary to say “no”
Because by saying “no” we can run into the other person’s reaction. And the consequences become unbearably scary. What if they think I’m a bad person, a terrible mother, a disgusting friend, and just a callous person? I’ll feel ashamed, guilty, and I’ll scold myself.
It’s very similar to a mother shaming a small child for not wanting to look after her sister: “Well, is it difficult for you? What do you mean binance data you don’t want to? She’s your little sister! Your own flesh and blood! How ungrateful you are, your mother does everything for you, and you behave like an egoist. Look! I worked and are feelings I’m tired. I work for you, so I can buy things and toys. Is it difficult for you to help your mother?”
The example above shows strong manipulation
A cleverly constructed proposal aimed at making the person feel guilty and ashamed and agree. Living with the feeling that I am bad because I do so much bad to my mother and she suffers so much because of me is are feelings unbearable. And it does not matter that the older child is not obliged to help with the younger one. Then the person grows up, and this model of behavior is reinforced and transferred to other people.
The inability to are in order to more accurately and efficiently set up feelings say “no” is about blurred personal boundaries, low adb directory self-esteem, and a terrible fear of facing consequences and experiencing stinging feelings towards yourself. But is this fear justified? As we saw in the example with my mother and sister, no. And so it is in everything else.